Gods not done yet

It’s a mother’s worst fear to lose a child. But when you get even more hard news, it’s a mother’s worst nightmare. We had an echo on baby a’s heart this week just to make sure everything was still okay after her identical twin sister passed last week, and unfortunately the cardiologist can see that it’s very stressed. She has two valves that are thickened and not closing properly due to the passing of her sister – they are calling this a ‘leaky heart’. She is being monitored very closely with daily stress tests at our surrogate’s house, weekly echo’s and ultrasounds, and lots of obstetrician appointments. This isn’t a common occurrence, and we don’t have any answers whether it could get worse or better, if she will be here in a week or several weeks, or if she will need heart surgery. Along with all the daily appointments, we also have an MRI for baby’s brain on June 1 to see if there was any disruption from a possible stroke to her when her sister passed. For all of you that pray, please keep us and our surrogate in your prayers and for all of you that just want to keep us in your thoughts, that is also really appreciated. I know baby a is a fighter – God has healed my heart so I’m praying he will heal hers as well:

Sweet baby girl, I’m thinking about you and praying for you every day, almost every minute. I’m sure you’re missing your sister’s cuddles. You two had a connection that was undeniable. It still brings a smile to my face, and often tears stream down my face, when I think back to you two snuggling, dancing, kicking, and sticking your bum in each other’s face. I’m so glad you got that time together, and that I got to be a part of it every week. One day I will tell you stories about you and your sister.

We are going to miss your sweet sister, but I want you to know that it’s going to be okay. We are going to be okay and will make it through this! We have an army of people praying for you. Stay strong and know that mommy, daddy, your brother, and older sister are waiting for you at home and love you so much. Every time your brother and sister see you, they run to you and start kissing you in the womb. They want to feel you kick as you’re one busy and active girl, not to mention big girl. You take after your older sister!

A part of me feels scared with all the unknowns of your heart condition and the upcoming MRI on your brain, but I’m thankful that the doctors are watching you so closely now. I know that you’re a fighter so please keep fighting and trust in God, as he is in control. You got this!

Can’t wait to hold you and love you,

Momma

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11